Feb. 23, 2025: Our Social Circles

I was recently listening to an interview on NPR with Derek Thompson about his most recent piece in The Atlantic, in which he talks about our move toward isolation and this being the “Anti-Social Century”.

He shared that our social circles are like rings around us, the closest being our inner circle of friends and family, then our community, and last, our world tribe. But what surprised me was when he talked about how social media has impacted each ring in far different ways, and in some cases, very positively. This was a new way of looking at it for me, since most of what is out there, pins much of the blame for our social isolation on social media. It is often lamented that it has replaced personal interactions, and is therefore, negative.

He pointed out that social media has strengthened our inner circle, because we can now engage in texts, video-calls, and other kinds of daily connections that were not possible just a few decades ago.  He also pointed out that social media has allowed us to connect with those that we share a similar interest with that do not live in close proximity to us. Think about all those Facebook groups devoted to a hobby, interest, or team. That is the world tribe social circle.

It is only our circle of community that has suffered in the era of social media. Those are our neighbors, acquaintances, and others that live near us, but do not fall into our inner circle.  In the past, these relationships and connections were built and nurtured in community centers, places of worship, city parks, and neighborhoods. Think of sitting on the front porch and then chatting with neighbors who might be out walking their dog.

Social media has supplanted those activities and places, as we now spend that time, inside, on our devices. Yes, some of that time is invested in strengthening the Inner Circle and the World Tribe connections, but what has suffered is our Community connections.

Mr. Thompson said that there are easy ways to chip away at this problem.

-       Get outside! Take a walk in the neighborhood. Sit on your front stoop.  Put your lawn chair in your driveway and wave at those who pass or walk by.

-       Choose the in-person event over the virtual whenever possible. Yes, you can attend that community meeting online, but connections will be nurtured and built in-person.

-       Look around you. Really make eye contact with those you pass in the grocery store isles. Smile at the person you see. Chat up the teller at the bank.

In other words… get off your device and look around!